Sunday, October 11, 2009

La Primera Parte: Flash-back


Salaamu Äleykumu Warahmatullah,
Glory be to Allah and peace and blessings be upon his prophet Muhammad,

Many of my friends are, those who asked me about my turning point. And loads are those who asked me to write about it. I must confess that I sort of neglected it. But when it comes to my dearest sister UmFahr request, I would not react thus. Actually it brings tears to my eyes each time I remember this holy engagement -I would call it- holding back myself this time, I would write it down with Allah's help.

My best friends, those who have known me for more than 5 years would call it a Metamorphose. Some of you don't know how old I am; well I am 18. Then it has been 2 years since I engaged myself into Islam Commitment. The beginning was pretty hard. But let's jet a flash back on my life how was it like before.


As any other girl, I had chums. Carefree chums as I used to be. I don't blame them for my disguidance. No, I had been just like them before I met them. Alhamdulillah, at that time I never cut off praying. But which praying? I would say working out not performing prayer. Going up, going down, kneeling, bending.. La ilaaha illa Llah! For sure that my way of praying was wrongly wrong. But the best thing -is meant to be the worst- is that I was making some slips in the easiest sûrah in Qur'aan. I would just curl up and die rather than giving more details about my old times prayers. Never done my prayers on time, never got up for Al-fajr prayer. Praying was like a burden to me.


Don't even ask! I can guess what you thinking about right now.. Oh yes I was a believer, I knew about the two shahada. I was saying I bear witness that there's no God but Allah and Muhammad is his messenger. Saying it but heedless of its deepest meaning. ~_~''


I don't blame my parents for not teaching me about my deen. Cause they have been raised in a non-religious environment as well. So they are not meant to carry the can! Islam became over the decades a tradition for their parents, their ancestors after all. Without mentioning fasting, I was just doing the ritual.

Ramadan for me and my relatives had been a month of special and delicious dishes but nothing else. I don't recall if I ever read Qur'aan in Ramadan. And if I did, that would be hardly ever. But never prayed taraweeh or salatul qiyam before, absolutely not. Was the case for the other members of my family as well.
They used to wake up before Al-fajr prayer to eat (suhur) but not to pray and some still. Yes some still wake up to eat and then go back to sleep without praying. Subhana'ALLAH. I didn't use to wake up just not to break my sleeping. ''_''


Well, going back to catch some z's then waking up late in the morning, spending the whole day in preparing those dishes, watching ridiculous soap operas and the absurd cooking tv shows. That's how I used to spend the holy month of Ramadan.
Oh yeah, I forgot to talk about the eid's prayer. There was nothing called eid prayer at home. No body used to go. The eid's day was again special but with what then? Guess.. A special dish as ever. =_='

Would die of shame telling you about my ignoble deeds!

*Muy pronto que pensaba está hecha la primera parte, aúnque sea poco. Dejenme un ratito más de tiempo y vais a ver (:

10 comments:

AbuBakr said...

Pues..tu artículo es perfectamente hecho. Confieso también que es muy difícil escribir sobre sus propios errores.. Y por esto te digo Oumay felicidades.
Masha´Allah nunca encontre a una chica a tu edad que fue muy creyente así :)
Baaraka Allahu feeki
Esperando al resto :)

UmFahr said...

My Dear Oumay,
Jazaki ALLAH khayran. You're so dear to me as well. Love you for the sake of ALLAH. (:
Um.. Apologies (: Didn't know that writing about it would make you such a pain. As you mentioned Oumay the word heedless. Many muslims nowadays are so.
But trust me, you'd make an outstanding writer. Insha'Allah. Can't wait to see the second part. Hurry up!
Oh well take your time.. No rush ;)

Amy :) said...

Ooh Oumay.. I've found myself speachless after reading the first part of your commitment story. Never thought you had such a background.
I always been thinking that you were born in a so-religious milieu cause of the knowledge you carry Mashaa Allah x)
Odd but still amazing.. Carry on dear!

Oumay said...

Jazaaka Allahu Khayran por tu comentario AbuBakr.
Muy simpático hermano eres.
O Allah me dan mucha vergüenza y al mismo tiempo pena cuando leo eso. Anyways, es una buen ocasión para acordarme y acordaros de esa bendición de guía (:
Todavía no he empezado la segunda parte.. Ya lo sé debo darme prisa insha´Allah (:

Oumay said...

Dearest UmFahr,
It's okay, that remind me tehe great blessing of guidance. No worries :)
I'm working on it right now..
Yea no rush ;) Good stuff over here.

Oumay said...

Well Amy, may be we dinna have much time to talk about each one of us background.
Discussing religious stuff every now and then was what we liked most. Ain't it? :)
And that would be kinda lesson to you not to be misled by appearences next time ;) Yeaa even good ones.
Fi amani Allah

Amatullah said...

Oh hafizaki Allah.
I saw the link via facebook. You didn't tell me about this new project ;)
Pues en una palabra MANIFICO!
Sigue queridamia (:

An Old Friend ;) said...

Hmm acabo justo de leer tu artículo. Como dijo AbuBakr está perfectamente hecho ;)
You are doing good carry on :)

Oumay said...

O you lady Amatullah! Haven't seen you from ages! Well how could I let you know and it's hardly ever when I talk to you?! :)
Hafizaki Allahu wa ra'äki :)
Estoy escribiendo la segunda parte!
Hasta pronto insha'Allah

Oumay said...

Actually I appreciate your comment oldy friend. But can't recognize you. My old friends don't speak spanish or you'd be from El instituto Cervantes?
Wouldn't you be Mahmoud? We weren't classmates, I was at that time in Intermedio 4 if I still remember. Well you just titillated me! ^_^
Anyway hope to hear from you again ;)